The Episodes

Episodes

Episodes:

1

2

3

4

5

6

7

8

9

10

11

12

13

U2 - The Early Years

CAST

Ben Stiller Bono Dave Madden Mr. Kinkaid Jeff Kahn The Edge Andy Dick . Adam Clayton Bob Odenkirk Larry Mullen

ANNOUNCER It's Ben Stiller's Rocumentary: U2--The Early Years!

BONO It was very difficult for us when we were starting out. We had this horrible old manager who didn't understand us.

MR. KINKAID I loved those boys like they were my own sons. He came to me, you know. Oh yeah.

BONO Mr. Kinkaid used to drive us about in this ramshackle, old multi-colored school bus, taking us from gig to gig. He was talking about how we were gonna make it in the show business.

MR. KINKAID Oh, I was full of ideas back then.

BONO He wanted to get a little girl to play tambourine with us but we nixed that one.

MR. KINKAID With Bono, it was always about ... the message. So, I gave him a message: If Joel Wasserstein doesn't have fun at his bar mitzvah, you're not getting paid. Comprende?

Joel Wasserstein's Bar Mitzvah, Long Island, NY, 1980

[See snippet: 5MB, Quicktime]

BONO Thank you! Well, I hope you're having a good time here at the Joel's bar mitzvah. We're all real proud of him. Look at him, the very vision of manhood. And how about Leo Krupnick, who made that great gafilte fish sculpture, huh? Everyone taste the fish sculpture -- it's great!

Alright Joel, get up here, come on up here. Joel reluctantly gets up from his seat.

And I hope everyone's ready to dance the Hora and the Hokey Pokey soon, I don't want to see anybody sitting. Alright, Joel. Today Joel is a man!

Alright Edge, play the blues!

The Edge plays "Hava Negeliah" on his guitar while Bono grabs a handheld spotlight and shines it all over Joel, a la the "blue sky" segment in "Rattle & Hum."

BONO Thank you, Joel!

I'll tell you something else. I'm sick and tired of what's going on in Northern Ireland.

MR. KINKAID Okay, so it wasn't Carnegie Hall. But you gotta start somewhere.

(Special thanks to Kevin Leonard for transcribing this!)



	Episodes: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13		U2 - The Early Years CAST Ben Stiller Bono Dave Madden Mr. Kinkaid Jeff Kahn The Edge Andy Dick . Adam Clayton Bob Odenkirk Larry Mullen ANNOUNCER It's Ben Stiller's Rocumentary: U2--The Early Years! BONO It was very difficult for us when we were starting out. We had this horrible old manager who didn't understand us. MR. KINKAID I loved those boys like they were my own sons. He came to me, you know. Oh yeah. BONO Mr. Kinkaid used to drive us about in this ramshackle, old multi-colored school bus, taking us from gig to gig. He was talking about how we were gonna make it in the show business. MR. KINKAID Oh, I was full of ideas back then. BONO He wanted to get a little girl to play tambourine with us but we nixed that one. MR. KINKAID With Bono, it was always about ... the message. So, I gave him a message: If Joel Wasserstein doesn't have fun at his bar mitzvah, you're not getting paid. Comprende? Joel Wasserstein's Bar Mitzvah, Long Island, NY, 1980 [See snippet: 5MB, Quicktime] BONO Thank you! Well, I hope you're having a good time here at the Joel's bar mitzvah. We're all real proud of him. Look at him, the very vision of manhood. And how about Leo Krupnick, who made that great gafilte fish sculpture, huh? Everyone taste the fish sculpture -- it's great! Alright Joel, get up here, come on up here. Joel reluctantly gets up from his seat. And I hope everyone's ready to dance the Hora and the Hokey Pokey soon, I don't want to see anybody sitting. Alright, Joel. Today Joel is a man! Alright Edge, play the blues! The Edge plays "Hava Negeliah" on his guitar while Bono grabs a handheld spotlight and shines it all over Joel, a la the "blue sky" segment in "Rattle & Hum." BONO Thank you, Joel! I'll tell you something else. I'm sick and tired of what's going on in Northern Ireland. MR. KINKAID Okay, so it wasn't Carnegie Hall. But you gotta start somewhere. (Special thanks to Kevin Leonard for transcribing this!)